You did it.
And whether you’re in the middle of divorce proceedings or have been divorced for over a decade… let’s face it, you have achieved a major accomplishment.
Give yourself a well-deserved pat on the back or a mani/pedi.
It’s not easy opening all those Happy-Family-Photo-Holiday-Cards, when your own family has been smashed to smithereens.
Even if you too sent out your share of perfect-family-portraits through the years and know (all too well) most of those perfect-family-portraits aren’t always an accurate representation of what’s going on behind closed doors.
It’s still hard.
And there is no denying New Year’s Eve can be a divorced mom’s most difficult Holiday Hurdle.
My First NYE was a week after we signed our divorce agreement. My ex was ringing in the New Year with his “new” girlfriend and I drove back to my hometown with my youngest kids.
At Midnight, as my kids slept in my childhood bedroom, I remember sitting with my parents watching the happy couples kissing in Times Square and feeling completely broken, confused and scared to death.
Yes, the holidays can be really difficult for divorced moms for endless reasons, but you survived and it is A NEW YEAR, a new chapter, a fresh page with nothing written and there is only ONE THING that is going to set the tone for how your new year will progress!!
And that one thing is: YOU!
It’s Time To Pick Up The Pieces And Dream New Dreams
Believe me. It doesn’t matter if you’re struggling to find a job, to make ends meet, to console your unhappy-miserable-angry kids, or if your EX continues to make your life a living hell. Seriously, none of that matters. Because life isn’t perfect. Shit happens. You may recall your life wasn’t all that great before the divorce either and if you think it was… well, Missy, I guess you were wrong.
So, here you are.
A divorced mom.
Sure you will continue to face a bunch of challenges, and hurdles, and pain, and problems… But, you got this mama.
You. Are. Not. Alone!
Look around you. There are friends, family, organizations, social networks and plenty of other divorced moms surrounding you and available to help.
Choose to reach-out when you need help. Choose to cry when you’re sad, or wack a pillow with a tennis racquet when you’re mad… but for heaven sake, don’t forget to see all the good things too.
Don’t forget you have choices.
You are a divorced mom with choices.
There will always be problems, but there will also ALWAYS be solutions.
There will always be pain, but there will also ALWAYS be comfort.
There will always be darkness, but there will also ALWAYS be light.
There will always be unhappiness, but there will also ALWAYS be joy.
I can guarantee you in every day, even in every moment, You Can Find Joy.
CHOOSE to find joy in every day. Sometimes it’s easy to find. Sometimes it’s much more difficult. But if you realize it is your choice to look for the joy amongst the pain…
You Will Find It!!
Many divorced moms feel like their dream of Happily Ever After has become a nightmare and all their hard work to create a perfectly happy home for their children only ended in disaster.
We may feel like a failure as a wife and mother.
So, now what?
Well, that is 100% up to YOU!
Pick up the pieces. Start dreaming new dreams. Celebrate your successes.
Begin by celebrating the fact you survived the Holidays!
Yep, here you are. January 2019.
A divorced mom with choices.